The Power of Social Connection: A Prescription for a Happy and Healthy Life

What if there was a way you could live a happier, healthier and longer life? A way to decrease your risk of heart disease, stroke, depression and dementia. This intervention is free, generally readily available and has no side effects.

The secret to a healthy and happy life is social connection.

Social connection profoundly affects our health and is essential to our well-being. A lack of good social connection can increase the risk of premature death to levels comparable to smoking 15 cigarettes a day. It may even be a greater risk than being obese or physically inactive.

The Harvard Study of Adult Development found that the people who were the most satisfied in their relationships at the age of 50 were the healthiest at age 80. In fact, people's level of satisfaction with their relationships at age 50 was a better predictor of physical health than their cholesterol levels.

Social Isolation vs Loneliness

People may lack social connection in various ways, though we often measure social isolation and loneliness. Social isolation refers to being alone objectively: having few social relationships, infrequent social contacts, and little involvement in clubs or organizations.

On the other hand, loneliness refers to subjectively feeling lonely or the distressing experience that results from the discrepancy between one's desired level of connection and one's actual level. Although those who are socially isolated may feel lonely, social isolation and loneliness are not necessarily found together. Both social isolation and loneliness increase the risk of premature mortality by almost 30% each.

Social isolation and loneliness have generally been underrecognized and underappreciated relative to the evidence supporting their public health importance. The COVID-19 pandemic illuminated these health threats' seriousness and urgency, leading the surgeon general to issue an advisory in May of 2023. In his advisory, "Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community," he asks us to prioritize building social connections in the same way we have prioritized other critical public health issues such as tobacco, obesity and substance abuse disorders.

Mapping Your Social Connections: Assessing Your Support Network

Before we discuss ways to improve your social connections, let's assess your current social resources. Get a paper and pen and draw three concentric circles. Keep in mind that people have differing needs when it comes to social connections, so there is no right number of connections. Scroll down and consult the social connections map graphic for reference during this exercise, if needed.

In the inner circle, write the names of the people with whom you are most closely connected. These could be partners, close friends, or family. Include here that person you would call at 2 AM if you woke and were scared or had a crisis.

In the middle circle, write the names of occasional companions such as past or present coworkers, former classmates, and distant relatives. These are not our closest confidants, but they will likely assist, especially when requested. You may notice that friends can move from the inner circle to the middle if you don't invest time in the friendships. On the other hand, a friend may move from the middle to the inner circle as that friendship grows.

In the outer circle, write down the places you regularly visit and see people you are familiar with but not close to. This could be the grocery store, gym, yoga, places of worship, school/work. These are less intimate connections but still contribute to a feeling of belonging. Spending time expanding this circle supports building the inner circles.

How to Improve Social Connections

If you find that you are not satisfied with your levels of social connection, here are some things you can do:

• Invest time in nurturing your relationships through consistent, frequent, high-quality engagement with others.
• Seek opportunities to serve and support others. Studies show that volunteering can ease feelings of loneliness and broaden our social networks.
• Reduce practices that lead to feelings of disconnection from others, such as harmful social media use, time spent in unhealthy relationships, and disproportionate time in front of screens instead of people.
• Participate in social and community groups such as fitness, religious, hobby, professional and community service organizations.
• Seek help during times of loneliness by reaching out to a family member, friend, counselor, health care provider or the 988 crisis line.
• Be responsive and supportive and practice gratitude. As we practice these behaviors, others are more likely to reciprocate, strengthening our social bonds, improving relationships and building social capital.
• To increase the quality of time you spend with others, minimize distraction during conversation. There is something called "partial attention", where we are half present and half distracted by our phones. Put down your devices and give your family and friends your full attention.

"Attention is the most basic form of love. By paying attention, we let ourselves be touched by life, and our hearts naturally become more open and engaged."
Tara Brach

Interested in learning more? Watch 'Social Connection: A Prescription for Health and Happiness' featuring Dr. Erika Blank to discover valuable insights into how meaningful relationships can enhance your well-being.